Category Archives: Uncategorized

Who is Rubyschild?

Jas_0001_NEW

I am sure you are wondering what’s up with the new blog name. Well, I never felt like myblogmysoapbox really fully represented me. Yes, I definitely have a soapbox both on and off the net and I tend to spare no one when when I feel the need to stand on it. But, that’s not who I am, that’s more what I do. When I ask myself the tough question, “who am I?” I always first think of myself as my grandmother’s child.

My grandmother, Ruby Geneva Anderson, was my mother. She raised me from baby to young adulthood. She was a beautiful woman, inside and out, and everyone loved her for it. When I say everyone, I really mean EVERYONE. She had so many surrogate children, both those that were raised by her and those that were spiritually guided by her.

She taught me the importance of being honest, kind, and resilient. She instilled in me the importance of being gracious in good times and being strong in hard times. She made sure I understood that actions have consequences and that I also appreciated the importance of forgiveness. She is the reason I have worked hard to make something of my life and a better future for my (future) children.

Ruby is the woman I hope to become. This blog is dedicated to her.

 

Hello Again World and Turning 30.

I came across this video today and it got me thinking about how I responded to turning 30 in 2012. It was not pretty people. I know there are going to be people who say, snap out of it, 30 is not old! get over yourself. But no one could save me from that moment. I was in the middle of a crisis. I was turning 30, had a shit ton of debt, no home (a tiny apartment in Brooklyn NY, but no home), no husband (a 2 year long fiance, but no husband), no kids (a cat that I adore, but, well…no buts, my cat is awesome), and a job that I only semi-liked. I remember being 3 and thinking I would be queen of the world by the time I turned an age like 30!

Nevertheless, I survived the calamity that is turning the big 3-0 and am still in much the same shape (+1 lovely husband, who is, by the way, metaphorically the boy in blue in the video). I think sometimes you have to cry. It helps you get it out and you can then move on. I moved on and spent that big day in Paris. Not too bad after all. Most importantly, despite the influx of gray hair I’ve been noticing lately and the debt that is still staring me down every time I look at my husband’s nifty ‘family net worth’ spreadsheet, I woke up 30 (and then 31) and never lost the feeling that life is full of promise and tomorrows are full of hope.

I am sure this cutie had a wonderful 4th birthday. I hope she got a pony and that there were no clowns. I hate clowns. So in light of coming to terms with my age and never having a pony of my own, I have decided to revive my blog and rename it rubyschild.com (more on this later). Even if no one ever reads this, it’s for me. going to port over my old posts, just to keep them all together.

Enjoy!

I Couldn’t Resist: Weiner-gate 2011

Why oh why do some men make it so damn easy?

I am sure you have all seen the headlines. What in the world was Congressman Weiner thinking?  Really? Those tweets were private? You aren’t married? Your wife isn’t three months pregnant? GTFOH. NOW. Late Sunday afternoon, I curled up in bed with some Starbucks and the NYTIMES and I read an interesting article about men and women in politics.

The premise of the article, When it Comes to Scandal, Girls Won’t Be Boys, is that men in politics are more often caught up in sex scandals because they are more often involved in politics for themselves, seeing it as a means to obtain power (a.k.a an extramarital rendezvous) rather than a means to help their community, state or country. Men see it as a career path that provides political and personal gain. Whereas women see it as a true responsibility, having taken a close examination of the injustices in society, set out to make things right, or at least better. Women, still underrepresented in politics, take the job more seriously than men and would not dare tarnish their names by having an illegitimate child (secret for 10+ years or during a spouse’s fight against cancer), an Argentine lover, or a paid-with-government funds hooker.

The article really got me to thinking about what politics perhaps used to be: a safe haven for men who had a thirst for power and a desire to use it to show their private parts to any woman willing to yield to their power. To a completely different place where you have to be accountable and willing to serve others as opposed to yourself. In my opinion, this doesn’t mean that men are completely out of the running. I think there are some who truly want to make a difference. In fact, as women gain more political power, I think they would be stupid not to learn from these mistakes and keep the boy-toys out of the governor’s mansion. Because it’s likely that those with other motives will be phased out.

What’s even more interesting about this new phase in politics is the fact that it is being driven primarily by technology. No longer can politicians do things under the cloak of darkness; all will come to the light eventually, and once it sees a glimmer of light, it will become bright as day. Think Bill Clinton — if we had a video of him being Lewinsky-ed, I don’t know if the impeachment process would have necessarily worked out in his favor.  Nowadays, news passes from one laptop to another ipad like wildfire and there is just no way to make up a story or a press released comment in time to keep up with it. Because of this reality, politicians can no longer seek shelter in their political parties; once constituents read about your indiscretions in a blog post or see your photos on Twitter, every person you called a friend in Washington will distance themselves (after all, no one wants their twitpics exposed because they were too sympathetic to your situation!). So you have to be in the game for the right reasons or you will be out the game, quite quickly.

Let’s get one thing straight — I am from California. Born and raised, a true liberal. I do not think that the Congressman should be nailed to the cross for showing his goods over Twitter, they are his goods to show after all. What I truly can’t believe is how he chose to deny it, and actually get quite indignant — did you see the first time he spoke to the press on the topic? He actually cursed one of the journalists. I mean, I am sorry Mr. Weiner, but those are your goodies, correct? That is you taking a self-portrait of those goodies, correct? Don’t pretend to be angry and baffled by the release of these photos, YOU TOOK THEM! The same goes for his moral uncouth predecessors — why deny? You have been caught holding the bag, surrender without further resistance. Don’t go to rehab as a last resort my political Tiger Woods, go to rehab as a first resort — run to rehab without delay, Americans still feel pity for the junkie.

So, bottom line, I don’t think he should lose his seat simply because he had some web-based indiscretions. I think he should lose his seat because he thought the American public would be dumb enough to believe it wasn’t him, despite his face appearing in the pictures. News flash — we may be fat, we may be closed-minded, we may stare too long at shiny things and enjoy the occasional meaningless slogan, but we are not complete neanderthals. We are firm believers in the fact that the ‘internet don’t lie’… and P.S. we can see the Wiener in the photos.

The 5 Things I Learned from Dame Elizabeth Taylor

I just finished reading, “Elizabeth” by J. Randy Taraborrelli. Elizabeth Taylor recently passed away and I realized that beyond the “White Diamonds” commercials I used to watch as a little girl, and my grandmother reading about her exploits in the papers (I was too young at the time to be allowed to read these ‘adult’ stories), I really didn’t know much about the legend. 


Taraborrelli’s account of Elizabeth Taylors like is really lovely. I’ve heard that many biographies about Elizabeth Taylor can be quite scathing — she made some mistakes in her life and some people hated her for them. 


This version of her life however, while not bias to the point of painting her as a saint, delivers a more level perspective of her life than I initially anticipated. Throughout the course of the story, I admired, despised, pitted, and again admired Elizabeth. While we can all look at her life and judge, I think I’ve taken five important lessons from her story: 

1. A little drama keeps life interesting: Elizabeth had a flare for the dramatic. Every moment of her life, even the aspects of her life that weren’t in front of a camera played out in the most typically dramatic fashion. While filming Cleopatra, Elizabeth and Richard Burton began a love affair behind Eddie Fisher’s back, Eddie soon found out and confronted “Liz and Dick” at a party hosted at Elizabeth and Eddie’s villa. Burton shouted at Eddie that Elizabeth was now his woman and demanded Elizabeth come over and kiss him (“put your tongue down my throat” was the exact words) in front of not only her husband, but the whole room full of people. Surprising everyone, Elizabeth did just that, then she ran to the top of the stairs, raised her glass and drank a whole glass of champagne in one gulp, then disappeared into her bedroom not to return to the party she was hosting. Talk about dramatic! But at the same time, doesn’t it make for a good story? While this might be a bit too extreme for most of our tastes, taking just a taste of Elizabeth’s life’s drama into are own could definitely leave us with some nights to remember. 

2. Diamonds really are fabulous: Elizabeth was given some of the most beautiful pieces of jewelery in the world by the men in her life. When she was married to Mike Todd, she would wear her tiara to swim, she received the Krupp diamond from Richard Burton (as well as the the Taylor-Burton diamond). I can go on and on about the woman’s jewel collection (which will soon be auctioned by Christie’s), and the truth is, even as I pride myself (try to convince myself) on not being a materialistic person, diamonds are truly a girl’s best friend (smiling with my eyes closed as I imagine swimming while wearing many many sparkling things – FAB!). 

3. You can’t blame your parents for everything: Try as best she could, but there was no way anyone can truly believe that the tragic aspects of Elizabeth’s life were due to her experiences as a child. She often times had these recollections of her childhood that were painful, tainted, and she linked that tough childhood to the tragic aspects of her life as an adult, over-relating to other tragic stars like Michael Jackson. Why do I claim she over-related? Sure, her mother got her started in show business very early in life, and true her parents had a weird dynamic most of her life. But Elizabeth got herself into most of the trouble she ended-up in (most of which was in her love life). Her parents only tried to be patient as she worked her way through her 3rd and 4th etc. marriages. Better yet, if they were responsible for the bad stuff, they definitely get the credit for the good stuff. It’s just so easy to blame your parents when your life is miserable, isn’t it? Next time a relationship goes south, remind me not to blame my controlling mother or absentee dad — I still might, so definitely remember to remind me. 
4. What goes around comes around: I know you’ve all heard this one before. But it’s probably the truest saying in the world over. Elizabeth shared her bed with a married man (Eddie Fisher), who subsequently left his wife for her, POW! Elizabeth later fell madly in love with Richard Burton, and despite her longing and desperate efforts to maintain the relationship, he ultimately left her for a BBD (bigger better deal — in this case younger better deal), BOOM!
5. Live life such that you get everything from it you want: People may have critical things to say about you, no matter what you do. So the best you can do is love the people around you and take life by the you-know-what. Elizabeth traveled the world, loved deeply, had children, had a infamous career and did all of this in the most glamorous way imaginable.
RIP Dame Elizabeth Taylor.